It walks, talks, and quacks like a human vagina.

My vagina has never been drier. 

I want to tongue punch your fart box. 

She wants a house full of cups and the ghosts of last century’s lesbians. 

Your finger just got excited, is all. 

It’s some kind of fantastical mutant from the recesses of your happy place. 

If we put your brain in a fish it would bark.