In the washing machine, and the birds just keep opening their mouths because they're stupid, so they keep getting bigger...

It's like I'm sitting in the front pew of the Church of the Pickle.

Hanging out with you is like having a tumor that sings show tunes.

Your bazooka is passing through my nose.

No I am not Puerto Rican! I am not wearing a flag or a baby!

You don't beat around the bush when it comes to another man's penis.

Vaginas have confused me too much, I need some dinosaurs.

I'll grab it after you untie me.

Are you sure I won't get a virus if I put this in my slot?

So, wait, is "penis" better than "pants?"